Update On The Pelican

Or What Really Became Of The Pelican?


Our fine feathered friend has met his demise.  It isn't clear as to exactly what happened.  But out of respect for his continued resilience or harassment, depending on how you view the circumstances, I have had him preserved so to speak.

Rest in peace Satchel Mouth

It all started on the last active morning of our cruise.  We were accustomed to hearing the pelican, whom we had named, Satchel Mouth, do a fly over of the boat and give off this most disgusting regurgitating sound. This was presumably a standing morning insult that might get a laugh from the pelican community but which we didn't find that amusing.

So here are the facts, hearkening back to my many years as a policeman....  Satch was found dead on that very deck that he used to fly over.  Closer inspection disclosed that someone had pulled a piano wire from the bow to the back up antenna above the bridge.  Presumably Satch didn't see the wire in time and flew into it.

The question is: Was this wire strung to accommodate a piece of nautical equipment, like a radar disk?  Or was this act from the deepest darkest depths of man's soul... Murder!  So I rounded up the usual suspects,  the crew of the Sea Me Smile.  I was not one of the suspects, of course, as I am, after all, the captain and am above reproach.

Don't let that innocent face fool ya'

He has the know how to pull it off

Technology is his middle name

No one was forthcoming with any decent information, no matter how hard I interrogated them under bright lights, while constantly pounding on the table with a rubber hose.  Some of 'em even had the gall to suggest that I, the captain, shouldn't be exempt from the inquiry and that an outside investigator should be brought in to determine the facts.  A truly laughable suggestion.

After a short investigation, because you can't finger print a piano wire, my inquiry  brought me to the only logical conclusion that could possibly be determined by a person of my vast investigative skills...


       It was the worst case of suicide that I have ever encountered!
                                                               

                               No Pelicans were harmed in the creation of this story